Growing pains
This place is built on a very strict and hierarchic base. And just a few people are able to see trough it and take their responsibility as theatre makers.
I try to understand the head of technique’s here, and I begin to see that he is partly suffering from this system, but at the same time he is sustaining it.
The result is this: if this person from the west, with the new ideas and therefore the ‘new leader’, walks out, the work stops. The list with ‘things to be done’ is then just a paper thing; people nicely hang out in the sun. The everyday message is: ‘This is your future, what do you when I go back?’ Some understand, some don’t even react.
One person here learnt me that Nepali people are just like every people, with also negative habits. He was this negative in his work, you could feel his mood from yards, it was not doing any good to the group, so I had to send him out.
Now he is using the benefit of his language by backbiting – even in my presence. Some people here are ashamed by that, some amused. Two persons so strong, that they left no other option than explaining them that jalousie and negativity returns to them somehow, anyway. These people are regular visitors with dreams, without a job.
I see no reason untill so far to leave, especially not as a result of these games. Although it is quit strange to face this kind of negativity and disrespect. But if within some weeks nothing has changed in the way of thinking and reacting, I can do nothing else than explain to the director that the system here is not sustaining an environment for growing. Yet.
